9 years ago together with someone, we dreamed up a story I have been writing for as many years...one I need to finish...a story of love, desire, sadness...and a pain filled forever. This very special person helped me discover who I truly am, and again, has revived the person I will be until the day I die...the me, who had been lost in a world of hopelessness...but today only sees a hopeful today...a hopeful tomorrow...a hopeful forever...
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In my dream...we live as one...
I wonder how, sometimes. I wonder how one person can have such an affect on our lives, that we sometimes do next to impossible to feel. To experience. To know.
What is it that holds that power over us...I speak in the "us" sense, as it is a way of avoiding saying "me"...
But "me" is who I am talking about.
How do we allow people to affect our lives so much, in which we at times lose all control. Sometimes we do it for a rush...for a feeling of fullness...for being desired...for feeling something we have been searching for all our lives.
Allowing to be controlled, when losing control..is it good? In my case...all control was lost, yet holding on to bits and pieces of the reality that was ours. A reality, only the selfish could have left behind... A reality that was stronger than the beautiful stolen moments in a life filled with sadness.
Moments, that only could come from a fairy tale...moments that could only have been written from an experience only two souls. who were so much alike, could have written.
Was the desire...the passion...the happiness and the love not strong enough to build a forever....were the tears that were shared a way of cleansing our sins...or were the pools of tears we watched meld together...only intertwining our souls more...
Like a pretty marionette all dressed up, waiting for the strings to be pulled... to be brought to life, and to be made dance...its what i longed for...this was also an intoxicating desire for the puppet master a universe away...which could only result in disastrous consequences if the strings were not pulled in sequence..and as planned.
A time now past....a today filled with hope...and an unattainable tomorrow...which may be what we think at this instance in time...yet step away ..and those thoughts of a tomorrow without us...is unfathomable... So what? What next?
how do you cleanse yourself from the strongest, most forbidden, power you've ever felt....a power that is like me...doubled, two that are so much alike...in thought, in desires, in movements, yes the stars are what have made us ...a power that is stronger than every strength we have...until we find reality!
Like a pretty marionette all dressed up, waiting for the strings to be pulled... to be brought to life, and to be made dance...its what i longed for...this was also an intoxicating desire for the puppet master a universe away...which could only result in disastrous consequences if the strings were not pulled in sequence..and as planned.
A time now past....a today filled with hope...and an unattainable tomorrow...which may be what we think at this instance in time...yet step away ..and those thoughts of a tomorrow without us...is unfathomable... So what? What next?
how do you cleanse yourself from the strongest, most forbidden, power you've ever felt....a power that is like me...doubled, two that are so much alike...in thought, in desires, in movements, yes the stars are what have made us ...a power that is stronger than every strength we have...until we find reality!
Is it only a dream...a life filled dream from which you know you must awaken, but would give most anything to sleep forever, to relive the dream and never awaken to the reality from which you can not escape.
Our forever...will come...from the unspoken words...something only we could have written...something only we, two, have lived.
Dressing up...preparing the scene for a beautiful tomorrow...painting the landscape to relive what was brought to life in such an uncertain world. Yet, the uncertainty, is what made it more desirable. Empty...yet filled...with endless hopes for forever...
Our forever...will come...from the unspoken words...something only we could have written...something only we, two, have lived.
Dressing up...preparing the scene for a beautiful tomorrow...painting the landscape to relive what was brought to life in such an uncertain world. Yet, the uncertainty, is what made it more desirable. Empty...yet filled...with endless hopes for forever...
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next step...finish book!
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